Compassion Resilience Toolkit for School Leaders and Staff

In this toolkit, we will explore ways to maintain a compassionate presence in our interactions with students, families, and colleagues. The rationale for this work as described in the introduction points to many positive outcomes for us and others. It turns out that coming from a mindset of compassion greatly contributes to our job and life satisfaction.

Simply put, Compassion is concern for the wellbeing of others. It includes both the awareness of others’ distress coupled with a desire to alleviate it. At the same time that we desire to alleviate another’s distress, we also are confronted with the reality that we cannot “fix” another person’s pain. Throughout this toolkit we will explore our professional role in alleviating student, colleague and other’s distress while maintaining our well-being, in other words, we will focus on growing our compassion resilience.

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Leadership Activity

Conversations about Compassion – The Compassionate Instinct
Topic two on pages 13-15 of this guide focuses on compassion as a human instinct. Facilitate a conversation using the questions on page 14 related to the compassionate instinct in the school setting.

Staff Activity

Steps for Compassionate Action – Scenarios for Discussion

Compassionate Action Steps – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Introduction to staff support circles

Staff Support Circle Agenda – Compassionate Action

Within this section of the toolkit:

Brene Brown Empathy video

Fetzer Organization Compassion Conversations Guide

In the first section we underscored that compassionate action requires intent and skill. This section of the toolkit provides further definitions that are foundational to all else found throughout the toolkit. We will be introduced to the wellness model we will use in the toolkit and the concept of compassion fatigue. Activities will help us explore our beliefs about self-care and self-compassion.

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Leadership Activity

Conversations about Compassion
This conversation guide outlines five different conversations related to compassion and gives the resources needed to facilitate these in small groups. In section one you were asked to facilitate a discussion with the leadership team about the instinct humans have to be compassionate. For this section, facilitate a conversation with the leadership team and/or other small group or team within your school on the third topic, self-compassion. As a substitute, you can use the Kristin Neff article for the basis of your group discussion.

Staff Activity

Fatigue and Resilience in the Wellness Compass – Reflection

What Were Your Childhood Messages About Self-Care?

Staff Circle Agenda

Within this section of the toolkit:

Self-compassion article, Dr. Kristin Neff

Conversations about Compassion – a facilitator guide

Further resources:

For the animal lovers among us, this blog provides a wonderful overview of compassion resilience in the context of those who work in animal rescue

In this section of the toolkit we will delve more deeply into the concept of compassion fatigue; how it connects to our understanding of trauma, the stages that one might experience if compassion fatigue is not addressed, and how to assess our levels of secondary trauma, burnout and compassion satisfaction. As we grow in our understanding of the extent and impact of trauma on the students we teach, their families and our communities, our ability to maintain an open and compassionate approach can be challenged. Compassion fatigue can develop slowly overtime and go unrecognized. This section gives us insights that can guide us to take proactive measures to prevent its progression.

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Leadership Activity

Conversations about Compassion

Research links organizational culture to staff experience of compassion fatigue¹. One strong predictor of compassion fatigue is lack of clarity about the vision and mission of the organization. Leadership’s ability to align staff toward an overarching goal is an important key to staff job and compassion satisfaction. Creating a trauma-informed culture of support for staff enhances their ability to provide such a culture for the students and families they serve.

The STSI-OA is an assessment of the organization’s culture related to preventing and minimizing secondary trauma. The score is calculated online for your organization. Discuss results with your leadership team and consider one action to improve your school’s support for staff related to secondary trauma.

1. Condrey, Katherine M. The Relationship between Compassion Fatigue and Organizational Culture. Diss. George Fox University, 2015.

Staff Activity

Self-Assessment Tool
The ProQOL is a 30 question, self-administered, self-scored, free assessment.

It can be used on a regular basis as a self-check-in, offered in conjunction with supervisory or mentoring consultations, or as a basis for small group discussion. Please note that it is available on the ProQOL site in many languages.

Facilitators should be prepared to offer resources to staff whose ProQOL outcomes point to significant levels of burnout or secondary traumatic stress. Each district has employee support protocols and resources. Be sure you know those and remind staff that they exists and how to access them.

Stages of Compassion Fatigue – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

Within this section of the toolkit:

DPI’s Trauma Sensitive Schools Modules

Ross Greene’s Website

Cats Stages of Compassion Fatigue

Organizational Assessment

Individual Assessment

Cultivating Compassion – Commonalities Practice

As we have discovered in the previous sections of this toolkit, the goal of compassion resilience can be reached with the application of personal skills and perspectives combined with organizational policies and practices. In this section we will focus on the systemic factors that can negatively impact our compassion resilience and explore our response and potential role in making positive change.

We all work in imperfect systems. When we look outside of our own system to those that we rely on to provide for the health and well-being of our students and their families, we find more imperfection. The first step in lessening the negative impact of the systems in which we live and work is naming what it is about the systems that contributes to our compassion fatigue. The second step is to discover which items on that list we can change, which ones leadership can and will address, and which ones we would best be served by letting go.

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This document is for Toolkit Facilitators and Leadership Team Only
The following is a review of system factors that lead to compassion fatigue and those that are protective. Keep these factors in mind as you facilitate the combined staff and leadership activity below, What Can I Control?, and if you are on the leadership team, use this information to prepare and respond to the activity.

Leadership Activity and Staff Activity

What Can I Control?

Staff Activity

System Drivers – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

Within this section of the toolkit:

A short resource for friends and families of teachers on early career stress from the APA.

Many of us give the very best of who we are every day, yet all too often struggle to feel like our best is good enough. Understanding, and at times challenging our own expectations and perception of others’ expectations is key to identifying and transforming unrealistic expectations that compromise our ability to approach others with compassion and extend that compassion to ourselves. In this section, we identify the expectations we have for ourselves and for others and question whether these expectations are helpful for us or holding us back.

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Leadership Activity

The recommended activities provide ways to make workplace expectations more transparent and encourage healthy expectations among staff.

1. Provide staff with access to Caregivers’ Bills of Rights (1. Compassion Fatigue Awareness Project and 2. aPlaceforMom) which provides affirmations that help combat negative self-talk and expectations; bonus point for creating your own version with staff. Here are two examples from workplace and family perspectives:

   Example 1

   Example 2

2. Read the following article entitled “How to communicate employee expectations effectively” and after doing so, answer the following questions:
   — What efforts can you undertake to encourage regular and ongoing conversations with staff regarding expectations?
   — How can you more clearly communicate expectations to staff?
   — How can you affirm what you, others, or your team are doing well to meet expectations?
   — How might you encourage mentoring relationships and collaborative relationships among staff at your school?

Staff Activity

Clarifying Expectations (20-45 minutes)
The purpose of this activity is to examine whether our individual expectations are aligned with collective understanding.

Setting Helpful Expectations (20-30 minutes)
Many times, our expectations do not align with our own wants, needs, and values, but rather, represent things that are socially expected of us or things we are conditioned to believe. This exercise helps us set intentional expectations that are rooted in our values.

Expectations Discussion Prompts – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

To find out more about the negative consequences of “shoulding” on ourselves (and how to avoid doing so), check out this resource from the author of “The Positively Present Guide to Life.”

“Without boundaries, you will act, sleep, work, groan, feel used and fulfill basic responsibilities rather than make choices to live and love fully, to work hard and nobly, to fulfill your purpose and to contribute passionately to your world.” (Black, J. and Enns, G, Better Boundaries: Owning and Treasuring Your Life. Oakland, CA. Raincoat Books)

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Leadership Activity

Leadership Support for Boundary Setting – Guided Discussion (15-30 min)
The leadership team will address key questions after participating in the Zones of Helpfulness activity with the whole staff or a small group of staff members.

Staff Activity

Zone of Helpfulness (20-40 min)
This activity is a highly valuable activity to do with school teams or schoolwide at a staff meeting. It will also prepare you for the Staff Culture section of the Toolkit.

Compassionate Boundaries Reflection (15 min)

Types of Boundaries – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

Self-Help Alliance, Building Better Boundaries, 2010

“The only thing we have is one another. The only competitive advantage we have is the culture and values of the company. Anyone can open up a coffee store. We have no technology, we have no patent. All we have is the relationship around the values of the company and what we bring to the customer every day. And we all have to own it.” — Howard Schultz, CEO, Starbucks

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Leadership Activity

How to Avoid the Contagion Effect of Sharing Tough Stories between Colleagues
Read the information about low impact debriefing strategies and decide how to share with staff.

Leadership & Staff Activity

Create a Positive Staff Culture Contract (15-30 minutes in small group and 15-30 min in large group)

Staff Activity

Support Begins With Empathy! (10-15 min)

What Do You Want to Say About the Culture of Staff? – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

To further resource:

Excellent blog with examples from schools working on improving staff culture.

The four sectors of the compass model -Mind, Spirit, Strength and Heart- not only
contribute to our overall wellness, but also provide guidance on strategies to help build our compassion resilience. Before delving in further, you may want to take a self-assessment of your current wellness practices (attached). Hold onto this and notice if any that you marked as “this never occurred to me” change as you encounter the next four sections of the toolkit.

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Leadership Activity

Name and Celebrate Staff Competence

Showing appreciation to your staff and fellow co-workers is a part of a healthy, productive, and encouraging work culture. Here are some options to encourage appreciation and focus on the specific competencies of staff or staff teams that combine to produce your school’s positive outcomes.

1. Create a process where staff can nominate each other for staff appreciation
2. Create and maintain an ongoing list of assets of your team or workplace — Something everyone can add to and see in the teachers’ common gathering space
3. Develop a gratitude board, or employ other strategies to foster a workplace attitude of gratitude, such as the ideas provided here

Staff Activity

Appreciative Inquiry Reflection on Competence (15 mins-45 mins)

Power of the Positive Word (15 minutes-30 minutes)

Practicing Mindfulness – The Body Scan and Pause (3-10 minutes)

Staff Circle Agenda

To further resource:

Link to resources, videos, and tools to learn more about and develop a growth mindset.

Short video on using mindfulness in teaching practice.

Spirit is one of the four sectors of the compass model for self-care. Each area contributes to and helps build our compassion resilience. Spirit encompasses connecting to our sense of purpose with intentionality, exposing ourselves to resilience in those we serve, and recreating ourselves through rest and play.

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Leadership Activity

School vision and mission statement development (30-60min)

Staff Activity

Book study (30-60min)

Sharing Stories of Resilience (5-10 min)
Institute the regular practice of sharing stories about current and past students’ resilience.

Developing Your Professional Mission Statement (15-30 min)

Rest and Play Reflection – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Staff Circle Agenda

To further resource:

5 Elements of a Powerful Company Mission Statement

Social Justice and Self-Care: How can teachers do this work without burning out? Video blog from educator (38 mins)

In the compass model the four sectors, Mind, Spirit, Strength and Heart, not only contribute to your overall wellness, but also provide guidance on strategies to help build your compassion resilience. Strength is one of the sectors. Strength encompasses stress resilience and care for the body. Stress resilience allows us to maintain a non-anxious presence as we encounter the inevitable stressors of our job. Developing our ability to care for our bodies and listen to the signs that our bodies give us, support our whole health and minimize any unhealthy responses to stress. Becoming stress resilient and caring for our bodies often require assistance from others. Help seeking is a key skill for both of the areas in the strength section of the Wellness Compass.

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Leadership and Staff Activity

Listening and Responding to Your Body’s Stress Alarm (10-15 min)

Writing and Sharing Staff Resilience Stories (30-60 min)
One of our pilot schools for this toolkit experimented with an activity that went so well, they want to share it with other schools. Staff were asked to write a short story about an obstacle they faced and overcame. The stories were submitted anonymously and shared with students by random staff in various classes. The next day the homeroom teachers led a community building circle to talk about what the students had heard and what it meant to them.

Choose Nourishing vs. Depleting! – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

Care for Body – Develop Your Plan (10-15 min)

Why it is so hard for teachers to take care of themselves

Staff Circle Agenda

To further resource:

This article discusses the stages of change applied to emotional resilience. The website offers many brief articles on topics included in this toolkit.

In the compass model the four sectors, Mind, Spirit, Strength and Heart, not only contribute to your overall wellness, but also provide guidance on strategies to help build your compassion resilience. Heart is one of the sectors. This section will take a deeper look at our emotions, and our relationships- both with ourselves and with others. We will be invited to focus on our self-compassion as we seek to be compassionate in our relationships with students, families and colleagues.

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Leadership Activity

Fostering Relationship Building among Staff

Department of Public Instruction’s Emotional Regulation Plan

Staff Activity

Colleague Conversations – Use this Visual and Display in Staff Break Areas

A Self-Compassion Exercise (10min)

Self-Compassion Self-Scoring Scale (Dr. Neff)

Staff Circle Agenda

To further resource:

This article explains the importance of communication: 7 things to avoid, 11 things to keep in mind.

This article offers a brief introduction and tips for developing better communication skills through structured dialog and communicating your trust distinctions.

For more excellent resources on self-compassion go to Dr. Kristin Neff’s website

The opportunities educators have for relationships with parents can leave them vulnerable to compassion fatigue too. The drivers of compassion fatigue can be very similar to those that drive compassion fatigue around students. When we come to understand the trauma families face, try to meet unrealistic expectations of those relationships, and/or feel ineffective in building positive relationships with a parent, it can lead to behaviors that are signs of compassion fatigue. We do not have to look far to hear educators blaming parents, using the home life as an excuse for lowered expectation of students, and not wanting to get to know the family context of their students. Of course, the same is true in reverse. It is not uncommon to hear parents blaming educators for the challenges their children face and spending time building fences rather than bridges.

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Leadership and Staff Activities

Beach Ball Perspectives – activity for a staff meeting

Communicating with Parents When There is a Challenge – Handout and possible role-play activity

What to do when I feel attacked by a parent? – Professionally Speaking Article
This is an example of setting compassionate boundaries with parents.

Video of Teacher Care Meetings Strategy – Collaborative school, parent and student meeting to support positive changes

Stages of Change Applied to Parent Conversations

WI Office of Children’s Mental Health – Language Guide

Whether we are growing our compassion resilience to prevent compassion fatigue or to address existing compassion fatigue, this intentional shift often includes changing attitudes and behaviors that no longer serve us well. The Stages of Change offers a model for people to understand the complex path towards successful change and how to support our own change efforts as well as the change efforts of colleagues and those we
supervise. This model identifies effective action and responses at each stage to avoid the unintended negative consequences of mismatched efforts.

James Prochaska, John Norcross and Carlo DiClemente are the researchers and architects of the Stages of Change model. It is also known as the Transtheoretical Model. The model assesses an individual’s readiness to act on a new healthier behavior, and provides strategies, or processes of change to guide the individual through the stages of change to Action and Maintenance.

The Stages of Change Powerpoint provides an overview of the Stages of Change model. View the slides in the mode that allows you to read the notes for each slide.

Leadership Activity

What’s the Stage? What’s My Response? This brief activity lists statements to practice identifying the stage they represent. It will build leaders’ ability to identify what stage someone is at so they can choose effective supports for that person’s desired behavior change. Pages two and three provide a chart that takes the statements from the What Stage activity and suggests helpful responses to support that person in their current stage of change.

Staff Activity

Navigating Your Way Through the Stages of Change handout that describes each stage and gives self-help hints for those looking at their own change behaviors and hints for how to help others as they navigate change.

Individual Reflection Worksheet The individual names a target change and goal behavior, identifies the stage of their current change, and completes questions based on their stage of change.

One driver of compassion fatigue for anyone who seeks to offer support to others is their beliefs about behavior and what supports desired behaviors. If educators approach children, parents, or colleagues with the wrong belief about what problematic behavior means and requires, it is like beating their head against a wall and coming up empty-handed and exhausted. If your school has not spent time recently reviewing foundational beliefs about children’s behavior, consider presenting this slideshow and leading a brief discussion at your next staff meeting. 

Foundational Beliefs About Behaviors

We are often the first to see early signs of compassion fatigue and other emotional challenges our colleagues’ experience.  The information linked below provides guidance on how to respond in ways that are helpful and linked to resources your colleague may need.

Compassionate Response to Colleagues

The first stage of compassion fatigue is the Zealot Stage which often describes early career educators. The beginning years of an education career provide the opportunity to learn specific compassion resilience strategies that can support well-being, effectiveness in the classroom, and longevity in the field.

Support for Teachers in Early Years of Career

New Teachers Face Three Common Challenges

Responding to New Teachers’ Concerns

Fun and helpful blog on the kind of people you want to reach out to and keep some distance from in the early years of your career